Stop My Break Up – Get My Ex Back Tips & Advice Blog

One of the common issues that couples deal with is the loss of passion and spark. It’s easy to fall into a routine and become comfortable. Some people get so comfortable they are blinded by how emotionally unhealthy a relationship may be. If your ex has backed out of this relationship and you are certain there is no one in the waiting. This is a massive sign that they have been emotionally unhappy for a very long time.

It is not easy to admit sometimes love isn’t always enough. We can all fall in love with someone, but whether they are right for us is another matter all together. If your ex has emotionally checked out then it may be hard to bring them back. Not unless you change dramatically.

The trick however is that you must not change for someone else. You need to do it for yourself. The sad part is change isn’t instantaneous and often it can take years to really change. Some people never do because they are so stuck in a rut.

You need to address whether your partner still feels for you anymore. If they have completely moved on emotionally, you may need to consider moving on as well. However if they still hold some feelings towards you, you may still have a chance.

Communicate with them if you can to discover what is really missing for them. You need to be committed in helping the relationship grow and change. Just think of a relationship like a child; when it is young they grow a lot and very quickly but once they get older, their growth slows down a lot. This is not what you want. You need to grow together, encourage each other and share your journey together.

How often do you do activities you both enjoy together? Do you invite them into doing things that you enjoy? For example if you’re passionate about biking, do you ask your partner to bike with you? Sometimes it’s good to get them involved no matter if you think it might bore them. They may simply appreciate the offer.

Add a dash of spontaneity into your life and try to mix up your weekly activities. Try something new every week if you can. Not only does it get you out of the house, it will distract your mind and you get to meet new people as well. Learn and discover a whole lot during this period. Even if your ex is not around, you will feel a whole lot better about yourself.

Remember little bits of sweet gestures throughout the day are much better than one major one every now and then. The way to keep the passion going is to never stop wooing your partner. Try to be flirty and playful and do things without them expecting.

The secret to keeping the passion going is to consider each day with your partner as if it’s your last.

What do you do when your ex just dumped you out of nowhere and said they didn’t love you anymore? The unfortunate among us will have experienced such heartbreaking news and it is perhaps one of the most painful experiences you will ever have to go through.

At this point your whole world feels like it has crashed on you. You have no appetite for anything and even the things you loved to do feel so meaningless and stupid now. How could your ex abandon you like this? When you have given so much of yourself?

First you need to stop putting any blame on anyone, especially yourself. You feel rejected as it is, there is no need to beat yourself up even more. It is also very likely that the break up had absolutely nothing to do with you. Sometimes the person breaking up is the one with the main issues. In this case if they say it isn’t you, then believe that it really ISN’T. They are probably just as confused as you are.

The absolute worse thing you can do is beg for forgiveness and ask them to take you back. This is not the time to be acting desperate. Whatever their reason for breaking up, it is likely they did it to relief the pain they were going through themselves. It is best to agree with the break up and try to heal yourself in your own space.

How do you move on? You need to occupy yourself with different activities. Go out with some old friends you haven’t seen in a while. Indulge yourself in a certain hobby or activity that you missed while you were in the relationship. Spend time listening to other people’s problems and try to help them out instead of always talking about your own.

It will hurt a lot for the first week or even the first month. But the pain will eventually get better. As much as it is far from the truth right now. Have faith you WILL recover from it.

At this time, it is recommended that you cut all contact from your ex. This means even if they want to remain friends and call you everyday. You need to put your foot down and let them know firmly you need to be alone right now. As hard as it will be, staying in contact with your ex right now will only prolong the healing process and perhaps even stop you from moving on altogether. Let your ex know as nicely as possible why you shouldn’t speak for a while. At least until you feel you are ready to face them without breaking down again.

Take this opportunity to rearrange the furniture in your house, or do some housecleaning. Take the dog out for a long walk or take them to the beach. Get a new haircut, go shopping, listen to your favourite music and watch some funny movies. Get out and enjoy life. Try to keep in mind that although this relationship is over, you are at least one step closer to finding the true love of your life.

Take this time apart to work on things you might have neglected due to being in a relationship.

Watch movies

Movies are great because if they are compelling enough they help shift your mind to a different place and distract you from any pain in the present you are feeling. Get some comedy, horror, drama, any genre you are a fan of, just make sure they are GOOD movies and preferably NOT romance related.

Play video games

Similarly to movies, nowadays video games are so complex and realistic, they do a great job of pulling you out of reality. Find a game that you can really get lost in and will occupy your mind for a few hours.

Past hobby

Were there ever a hobby that you enjoyed in the past that you gave up due to been in a relationship? Rekindle your interest in a hobby such as writing, drawing, playing a musical instrument or anything at all. Dive yourself into the hobby and be grateful you finally have the time to focus on it instead of someone else always taking your attention away.

Music

Play some music you know will instantly cheer you up. Do however avoid the sad love songs, especially any that instantly will remind you of your ex. It would be even better to go out to a concert with some friends and really lose yourself in the music.

Play a sport

If there was a sport you wanted to try or one that you didn’t have time for previously due to your relationship, this is the perfect time to start getting active again. Similarly you could join a gym or start a martial art course.

Smiling to strangers

Try to smile to at least three strangers every time you live the house. You could make it even more interesting by smiling to three good looking strangers. This will boast your confidence and really forget your ex.

Read a book or start a blog

If you’re a reading and writing person, grab some books and delve into those. Personal development books are great for motivation as well as making money ones. You could also start a blog on something you’re interested in or know a lot about. You could even make money while doing it!

Shopping

Sometimes you need to spend some money to feel good. So get some friends or if you like to shop alone you can too, and head to your shopping centre. Think about all the money you can save now that you don’t have another person to worry about. You could also get a new haircut or make over to make yourself feel a whole lot better.

These are only a small list of possible things you could do to get your mind off your ex. Remember to enjoy your life and focus on the positives of been single again! Whether your ex will return to you again, if you have no control over it, then why not enjoy doing things you DO have control over.

You may have just broke up with your ex and now you’ve realized what a huge mistake you’ve made. Can you really get them back? One of the fears we have once we go through a break up is whether they still love us. Sure they might say they have feelings for us, perhaps even love still, but do they really mean it? Why would they or you break up with someone you are still in love with?

Love comes in many different forms and the sad truth is, love alone is hardly enough to sustain a relationship. But it is the foundation of any healthy relationship, so if we were to start anywhere it would be from there. If your ex is still on speaking terms with you, talk to them and understand why they want what they want and where you fit in.

If you’re the one who let a good relationship go, you need to carefully position yourself back into the good books of that other person. By breaking up with them, you have hurt them deeply and it possibly is too soon to make amends directly after a breakup. Whatever your reasons were, you must have had a reason. However stupid, let them know you are sorry but don’t be surprised if they don’t want to talk to you for a while.

Keep up communication with your ex but do not over do it. It is likely they are trying to get on with their life so you should do too. Take the time to learn from the break up and understand why it went wrong and how it could be fixed in the future. Simply telling your ex things will be different is not going to be enough.

Show them simply through your actions on a weekly basis you are trying to improve. They will reward you for your efforts and wooing them back will be a lot easier. Simply talk to them, express how you feel and take listen to what their needs are. In time they will be drawn back to you. Especially if there is no competition.

There is perhaps a belief that exes generally are exes for a reason and that once a relationship is over, then everyone outside of the relationship always strongly advice you NOT to pursue it any longer. For you on the other hand, the person who was IN the relationship, you might have slightly different views. One the one hand you might hate your ex because of the break up. On the other you still harbour deep and strong feelings for them and a part of you still wants them back. That is when the irrational part of your brain kicks in and you’re acting on emotions that might otherwise NOT be there. This rollercoaster ride you’re on directly AFTER a break up is dangerous, because you might do things that can damage the relationship even further.

Do you still want to have some type of relationship with your ex? Or are you completely over it and want nothing more than to forget everything about them and erase that part of your life forever.

So the big question is, if you want your ex back, can you get them back?

Well of course! Have you heard of the Law of Attraction? Anything you desire or want, you can attract into your life if you focus on it. That is why it will work. Is it really that simple?

Well, it is and it isn’t. When it comes to relationships, if we suddenly realized we lost something good, we might panic that we might never get them back again. This raise of panic will doom any chance of getting your ex back. It might not for every case, but it certainly doesn’t help. If you panic you will only draw more of the negative thoughts into your mind, thinking you might lose them forever will only make that wish come true.

If you’d like to learn more about winning back the hearts of your loved ones, don’t miss my other article here.

Getting annoyed you can’t stop thinking of your ex? Do you just want to get your life back on track? They appear to be moving on so why can’t you? The relationship did not end well and perhaps you keep agonizing over whether it should have ended at all. Perhaps you’re even building up a little resentment for your ex due to all the pain you’re going through right now.

Well please stop beating yourself up. It’s quite normal to miss a relationship once it’s gone. What you DO need to do is gain a handle on not obsessing over the past. It’s not healthy for you to hang onto what could have or should have been. At the same time hearing simply to ‘get over it’ or ‘you’ll get over it in time’ aren’t helping you much either. You can not switch your feelings on and off that easily and that is something you are finding the hardest to deal with. So much so that perhaps you wonder if you’ll ever stop feeling the way you do.

Now I’ll let you know how to stop thinking of your ex instantly, starting right now. Make sure you’re somewhere comfortable and preferrably by yourself. If you want to cleanse your mind from any thoughts of your ex here is what you need to do. The methods I’ll show you here can apply to any bad habit you want to stop.

I assume the reason you want to STOP thinking of your ex is because the thought of them brings up bad feelings or emotions in you. Now we will condition yourself to stop that habit.

Now start to think of your ex, the moment you do I want you to do something silly for me. I want you to clap your hands together. Do this quickly. Now as you slam your hands together, imagine you’re slamming the image of your ex like it’s printed on a piece of paper in front of you. Now try doing this 10 times, each time a bit faster than the last.

So start to think of your ex, and as soon as you do, clap your hands and you should imagine slamming the image of them in an instant. Do this until you instantly clap your hands the moment you think of them and they instantly disappear as you do.

This might seem silly but once you’ve done this a bunch of times, start to think of your ex, you’ll find you won’t need to clap your hands for you to imagine their image disappearing. If this technique isn’t working so well, you could try, instead of clapping your hands is to get up seek out the nearest person to you to start a conversation. If there’s no one closest to you, pick up the phone and call someone. (Not your ex though) The key is to the interrupt the behaviour.

Now although this might work temporarily, it won’t stop the longterm problems of WHY you keep thinking of your ex. To figure out the real issue going on here, you’ll need to do a bit of soul searching. Evaluate the relationship and decide what you really want.

So you’ve been trying for days to get in contact with your ex and it’s clear they are obviously avoiding you. You can hardly concentrate on much else during this period and it is driving you bananas. So what are some tips that you can do to get your ex to return your call?

First of all, you want to stir up a curiosity within them if you want to get their attention. There is no need for them to call if you keep calling them and don’t give them enough time to ‘miss you’. Back up for a few days and wait for them to slowly realize they haven’t heard from you in a while. Once their curiosity is peeked, you are much more likely to get a response out of them.

To start, send them a polite and courteous note letting them know you are sorry for any hurt you’ve caused and that you appreciate everything they’ve done for you. At the end mention how you’d love to thank them in person one last time. Once they hear this, not only will they be wondering what they’ve done but they will also want to hear what you’ve been doing. Especially if you give off the impression that you’re somehow different through your message.

ONE WARNING THOUGH: you will need a strategy after they DO call you back, it will be useless not to have one prepared or it will probably do more harm than good.
Now get your plan together to getting your ex back.